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Mommy radar August 3, 2007

Posted by Mrs Flipphead in family, kids, separation anxiety.
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Can someone please explain something to me?  How is it that my children seem to telepathically know in advance when I am going to use the bathroom, for any reason.  If I even think I have to use the bathroom, I get there and there is at least one boy and a cat there waiting for me.  Soon to be followed by the younger boy.

If, by some miracle, I manage to sneak in there by myself, I can practically set my watch by how long it will take before my older son pokes his head in and then comes in for a heart to heart (usually about something involving lions, elephants or whether I like chocolate cake). 

We are working on this, because I’m sure in about 10 years he will be emotionally scarred from his memories of joining mommy in the bathroom, if we don’t get him to realize that he needs to knock. 

I have started locking the bathroom door, but the lock is really loud and so it’s therefore like a mommy alarm to my littlest…who will then come running so that he can sit outside the bathroom door and cry because I am in there and he can’t get to me.

But here’s what I am really having trouble figuring out.  Why is it that  no matter where the  boys are in the house, they will find me if I am in the bathroom—every time.  But the other day, my eldest says to me, “Where’s daddy?”

I knew hubby was in the bathroom, so I said (with a smirk, I might add), “I don’t know…why don’t you go find him?”

So my eldest goes wandering through the house, calling out for his daddy.  First to the bedrooms…then back through the kitchen, calling down the basement stairs…then to the garage door…then to the living room…and back to the bedrooms…bypassing the bathroom several times without giving the closed door a second glance.

He never did find his daddy.

 Why is it that when I am in there, it’s like some secret hypnotist trigger that causes the boys to be drawn to the bathroom like zombies?  When hubby is in there…it’s like he’s been sucked into another dimension or a black hole–impossible to locate in this realm of existence?  Anyone?…  Anyone?…

Anywho, here’s a funny little tidbit from the parent/child communication gap archives.  Today I am fixing supper.  My eldest asks me, “Where do olives live mamma?”

Me (distracted and not really having processed the question):  “I don’t know.”

Him (emphatically and a little annoyed):  “Yes, you do! They live in trees!”

Me (still distracted):  “Oh, yes, you’re right.  I guess olives do sort of live in trees.”

Him (very annoyed at this point):  “NOoo! Not OLIVES—Owwwels!”  “Owls live in trees…and they sleep…in the day…and at nighttime they come out…right?  Mamma?!”

I wonder if you graduate from 4 year old kindergarten if even your mom can’t understand some of the things you say.

Well…  Cheers!  Goodnight.

Comments»

1. WalksFarWoman - August 4, 2007

Mrs F – You’re making me broody all over again!!! 🙂

2. bellajournal - August 4, 2007

omg, so unbelievably true! I have always had that same exact thing with my kids. Now, the only one who still has to “come in” is my 11 year old daughter. It’s like, she thinks its mommy-daughter time. When I lock it, she almost doesn’t know what to make of it! Talk about an invasion of personal space.

Hilarious!

Oh, and “(distracted and not really having processed the question)” been there. That’s so bad, I do it all the time.

3. Mrs Flipphead - August 4, 2007

WalksFarWoman-I know some day I will miss it…or so people keep telling me. I know it’s true though. I look at the oldest and think–where did my baby go?

Bella-He talks so much, and a lot of it isn’t directed at me, so I don’t always hear his questions. Bad, I know.

When I lock the door, my eldest doesn’t know what to make of it either. He will stand there rattling the knob back and forth saying, “Mama?! The door is broken!”

4. mr. flipphead - August 4, 2007

Are you saying that I should stop telling the kids that you have gone in to the bathroom?

5. Mr. Fabulous - August 4, 2007

I have cameras in your house and I text them when you are about to go potty.

6. Mrs Flipphead - August 4, 2007

Mr. & Mr.-I knew there was a conspiracy going on. Fab has the cameras and hubby sends out the troops.

Uh, Fab…they are 4 and 17 months. They don’t even know how to read…much less text. Oh, you mean you text my hubby. Now that I believe.

7. SANDY G. - August 5, 2007

In my case, it’s all my animals following me into the bathroom.

It was really bad after my dog had pups. Once they were getting around good I’d have 6 pups and 2 big dogs following me everywhere.

I’ve since found homes for the pups and the mom, so now I only have my Australian, Baby, and my kitten, Rosie following me.

~Sandy G.

8. Mrs Flipphead - August 5, 2007

I know what you mean, I used to have four cats and a siberian husky in there with me all the time. A couple of the cats are afraid of the kids, so they only venture upstairs after the boys go to bed. And of course I lost my husky several months ago. So now it’s usually just the boys and the one brave cat.

9. Scotty doesn't know - August 5, 2007

Oooh, that’s a tough one. I, personally, don’t have any little ones running around (yet) so I can’t offer an explanation but, if it makes you feel any better, one of my dogs, Luke, is always staring at me. No matter what, every time I walk through the den or get up from the couch, he is always up and alert, just staring at me. I guess it’s preparation for someday, when and if I do have a couple of juniors tearing it up through the house.

Take care, Mrs. Flipphead, hope you and your family are enjoying the weekend. Remember, Saints game tonight- Who Dat, Who Dat!!

10. Weng - August 9, 2007

Lol. When I get home from work, I almost always look for mom as (I assume) she already has dinner prepared.

Dad usually opens the door and he asked me once about it. ‘Why do you look for mom and not me?’

‘Uh… because you don’t cook…’ 😉

11. sudiegirl - August 10, 2007

I like to bother my sister when she’s in the bathroom. Her little nostrils flare and she gets all pissy when I do.

HEHEHEHEHEHEH

I know I bothered my mom in the bathroom as well, but she’s also stranded me without toilet paper so I guess it’s a revenge thing.

*sigh*

12. Mrs Flipphead - August 10, 2007

Scotty-When I figure out how to “cure” this. I will let you know for future reference.

Weng-I hope they don’t think I’m cooking dinner in there?!?!

Sudie-MWA HA HA HA….Revenge is sweet. Hmmm….stranded without toilet paper…I’ll have to remember that.


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