Den of Wolves

The other day, my four year old looked at his lunch and said, “Hey, what’s that on there?”  I had melted a cheese slice on his hot dog in an attempt to get him to actually eat the meat portion and not just the bun (you think you’ve got a picky eater….imagine having to entice your preschooler to eat a hot dog!…..and it’s a victory if he does!)

I explained that I had melted a cheese slice on it.  He promptly picked it up out of the bun (I thought he was getting ready to put the “offending” hot dog on his plate as usual so he could eat the bun, unobstructed).  Instead he took a bite, smiled and proclaimed, through a mouth full of cheesy hot dog, “Mama, you’re genius!”

Well, apparently so, because now he will eat a hot dog without the bun…the whole thing!  I must weep for joy now….

Yesterday he even tried a brat because I convinced him it was like a hot dog and bacon (he loves bacon).  It was really a stretch, but it worked and now he loves brats too.

You have no idea how much we struggle with this child to get him to eat anything.  Every time we find something healthy he likes to eat, suddenly he will decide he doesn’t like it anymore.  It’s not because we overdo it either.  It’s more like, if we don’t feed it to him for a few days or a week, he forgets he liked it and refuses to try it.

We have long, drawn out battles over food.  I feel like I spend half my life at the dining table.

I should clarify that I have tried all the tactics.  Battles over food was something I swore I would never do.

But when he refused to make the switch to the big kid Flinstone’s chewables and his diet mostly consisted of refined starches, and he would go for weeks without a vegetable or piece of fruit–I decided I had to admit that the tactic of letting him decide what to eat and just continuing to offer him healthy choices, was a total bust.

So we made the switch to the policy that he had to at least try one bite of everything and then if he didn’t like something, he could have something else.  But he is a smart and very stubborn kid. 

If he said he didn’t like something, he would stick to his guns, even if he secretly loved whatever it was.  He would wrinkle up his nose and tell me it was “icky”, no matter what.

So now we have reached the bargaining phase.  He must eat so many broccoli or cauliflower florets (which he doesn’t entirely mind–believe it or not) before he can get some desired food.  Nothing I do can convince him to eat corn. peas or carrots though, if you can believe that.  Isn’t corn usually the favorite vegetable of the preschool set?

He also has to drink about four ounces of milk with supper before he can have anything else to drink and also before he can leave the table (I have sat with him for long periods of time over the milk issue).  He kind of got over that when I hit upon the idea to race him.  We see who can drink their milk first. 

I could go on for hours about the food battles and the tactics we have used.  But I won’t.

I just thank God, every meal that my 15 month old relishes food.  He will try anything you put in front of him and eat almost anything you put in front of him, in large quantities!  He’s going to be a string bean like his daddy was.  What I wouldn’t do for that metabolism!

Unfortunately, younger son’s fascination with food translates into:  Will eat ANYTHING!  And I do mean ANYTHING!  I won’t go into all of the really disgusting, gross things I have caught him trying to eat, but suffice it to say that I regularly scan the floor for anything nasty that might have wound up there, because it will eventually make it into his mouth if I don’t.  Most recently, he ate a quantity of poster putty–Don’t ask!

Before I had two children, I used to hear about a small child choking and wonder what idiot parent gives their six month old (or whatever) a toy meant for a five year old.  Then I had two boys and I realized, “Duh!  It’s not the parent giving those choking hazards to the babies!  What an idiot I was not to realize that!”

Well, I’ve rambled about the gastric delights of small children long enough.  Younger son is crying now.  Signing off!